The countdown to Spring Day began as soon as we returned from spring break, but few students are realizing what exactly they are counting down to. This year, CAB has made it their mission to provide the best possible experience to the students and to outdo all years previous. “This is shaping up to be the best spring day we’ve had so far,” said traditions co-chair Mitch Hadfield.

“This year, we tried to revamp the whole Spring Day process to get more student input. The past decisions were made taking into account as much student opinion as possible, but we wanted a really formal, concrete way of getting student input and running the statistics on it,” said concert committee co-chair Greg Kokino.

CAB sent out a survey that got a generalized overview of some artists students were interested in as well as the genres students want to see. Naturally, with any open-ended survey, the results produced were diverse and numerous with 1,535 respondents. But the information garnered through that survey showed Bentley students preferred hip-hop/rap and electronic/house genres for the headlining performer. From the results, CAB took budget and availability into account to send out a second survey, to which 1,862 students responded, which asked students to rank artists by preference. After those results, Kokino said, “Whatever artist fit [budget and availability] that ranked the highest was the one chosen.”

The White Panda will be the opening performance to Nelly and although many students may not have heard of the mash up masters, they will definitely know the top billboard songs they remix. The survey results also aided CAB in this decision, as it was very clear students want a rap/hip-hop or electric/house show.

“[The White Panda] is the best fusion of electronic music [and hip-hop] while still keeping in line with the Nelly show,” said Kokino.

So, what is on tap for the rest of the day? Traditions committee co-chairs Mitch Hadfield and Madhu Narayan have bigger and better things planned for students this year. Of course, the inflatables are coming back – but don’t just write them off as same old, same old. In addition to the always-fun obstacle course, CAB has rented out some other fun ones. Tournaments will be held throughout the day, including kickball, a scavenger hunt and Harry’s Hill Climb. You can also win prizes at the different carnival games that will be present.

The BBQ near the Dana Center will be complemented with other fun foods. We can all expect the fried oreos and fried dough, but an ice cream truck will also be there. This year, get excited to have smoothies provided by Maui Wowi.

To keep you entertained all day leading up to the concert, CAB has thoughtfully planned big things. The day will feature three live performances. A live karaoke band will be on lower, giving students the opportunity to show off their singing voices as well as their memorization capacities. You better be brave, because this karaoke offers no lyrics screen. But this frees you up to really put on the performance of your life. Starting around 12:30 p.m., a well-known magician from the area will be blowing people’s minds and the Bentley Beats winner, Tyler Winthrop, will be performing to get the crowd amped as they wait in the long line to get into the concert.

CAB really has outdone themselves even just in terms of preparation. They are really making a move to incorporate student opinion and preferences. “[We] are reaching out to freshmen and sophomores on our committees to find out what they want to see as well as juniors and seniors to find out what they’ve already seen,” explains Kokino. Another thing to anticipate on Saturday: a new sound and light system. “With the sound and lights we put in this year, we think we are creating an experience that is unrivaled. When you walk into the Dana Center you will see something you haven’t seen before – guaranteed,” says Kokino. “It is definitely more of an experience than a concert,” adds concert committee co-chair Taylor Murphy.

So hope for amazing weather, prepare yourself for all of the festivities and brush up on your Nelly because for some of you, this will be your last Spring Day! But for the freshmen – welcome to Bentley!l

CAB did it again! After the epicness of Donald Glover last semester, CAB truly outdid themselves with Roastmaster General Jeff Ross. Ross brought to the stage the edgy set you expected, and that is not even mentioning the daring work of Anthony Jeselnik.

Josh Seiden opened up the night with his stand-up routine which has come a long way since his juggling beatbox days. Claiming he was given an explicit list of subjects he cannot touch, Seiden did a pretty good job of hitting nearly every point. The banned list included Asians, date rape, Malaria, and peanut allergies. In addition, he was barred from talking about “masturbating in Sea World…masturbating in Disney Land…[and] masturbating in front of Jeff Ross.” OK, so maybe he was able to steer clear of a good amount, but date rape jokes were running amuck. But most guys can agree – oxygen bars are pretty stupid, especially because you “can’t slip roofies to girls” there.

Second student opener, Ian Rich, paid homage to the countless AEPi brothers in the audience, describing how his father is “pretty Jewish…not the religion, just the insult.” The rest of his set was a combination of Wookie love and herpes jokes.

Jeselnik, some say, was raunchier than Ross with his over-the-top content with smooth and calm delivery. The audience knew they were in for a ride when Jeselnik expressed his strong stance as a comedian. “I think it’s very important to open up with a rape joke,” he explained. And this set the tone for the rest of his half-hour set, which many agree was way too short. He also tailored his comedy to Bentley, poking fun at the student population and its stereotypes. After calling us the “who’s who of who didn’t get into Harvard,” he fed off of audience member Kelsey. Making conversation about majors, once Kelsey revealed she was a marketing major, Jeselnik made the assumption that many Bentley students do, “….so you mean a housewife,” he stereotyped. The general themes of his set were his obsession with death; his nonchalant violence toward children, animals, and women; and sexual abuse, including molestation and date rape. The audience thoroughly enjoyed every word that came from Jeselnik’s mouth. And then, he asked the question that got everyone excited. “So, Anthony [to self], where are the really offensive jokes? Don’t worry. I save them for last.”  The audience gasped in disbelief before breaking out into laughter as his did lightning rounds of jokes on the following: “retarded people,” miscarriage, peanut allergies and his dead brother, and child molestation. He took a break and warned the crowd, “This is when shit gets real.” He finished up talking about stealing from the Holocaust Museum and finally a 9/11 dead baby joke.

The Roastmaster General Jeffrey Ross himself came on stage doing what he does best – insulting the very student who gave him a warm introduction. “This is going to be so much fucking fun,” said Ross while grinning. After a short set which included calling The Vanguard newspaper “Bird Sh!t Weekly” (to be the new title of the April Fool’s issue), Ross took volunteers to be the subject of his quickfire roast. In true Bentley fashion, 11 of the 12 volunteers were men. Ross brought back Jeselnik to tag-team with the insults. The insults flew about from “Good Fellas of Weight Watchers” to “gay hot chili pepper” wearing “size tourniquet pants.” One student was called a red-headed Verizon guy, while Ross stated that one looked like “a doctor poked [him] with a hanger.” And of course, the lone female stood her ground as Ross insulted her and then sexually harassed her.

In the few months while on tour doing Jeff Ross Roasts America, Ross has been slapped about 8 times and kicked twice. Both comedians really enjoyed the fact that literally nothing they said offended the crowd as a whole. Congratulations, Bentley students; we can hang in there with the best of them.

Dana Center filled to the brim with eager students looking to win prizes

Last Friday night, CAB sponsored Bentley’s annual Super Bingo event in the Dana Center, a tradition that has been around for over five years. About 1,300 students participated in the event, hoping to win prizes that included a 42-inch TV, iPad 2, Macbook Air, sports tickets, and $1,000 for various travel trips.

“The turnout was great,” said CAB Traditions co-chairs Madhumita Narayan and Mitchell Hadfield. “Super Bingo is definitely one of the most anticipated and well-attended events that CAB sponsors.”

“For CAB, Super Bingo is an essential event because we love seeing students get excited for such a tradition,” said Narayan. “We love seeing their anticipation.”

The Super Bingo event also incorporated a charity component by allowing students to donate two t-shirts, a pair of jeans, or a dress in return for an extra bingo card. The donations will benefit both Big Brother Big Sisters, a national charitable organization, and Bentley’s own Enchanted Closet, which donates dresses to underprivileged young women. Because this was more difficult than last year’s charity initiative of donating canned goods, no one had to be turned away from the event.

“I’ve heard only positive things about the event from students,” said Narayan. “People loved the prizes and they appreciated the clothing drive. Many students seemed to enjoy having something else to do on a Friday night besides the usual weekend routine.”

At 8 p.m., over 1,000 students lined up outside the Dana Center waiting to gain admittance to the event, which lasted until around 11 p.m. Students then played about 30 rounds of bingo, and many shouted their excitement for their friends when they were close to victory or their disappointment when someone won a prize that they really wanted.

Upon the conclusion of these games, students were able to receive a raffle ticket in return for handing in their bingo cards. During the raffle, even more prizes, including gift cards to local restaurants and popular stores, were given away.

CAB reveals show’s opener Far East Movement and headliner Lupe Fiaso

By Leslie Dias

After weeks of hype and speculation, CAB finalized their Spring Day contracts on Tuesday, March 8 with Far East Movement opening for Lupe Fiasco at this year’s show on April 30. This was confirmed by Ryan O’Keefe, the president of CAB.

Taylor Murray, the co-chair for Music and Entertainment, said, “I’m really excited about this year’s performers. I think we’re definitely staying on par with last year’s show.”

Four years after his last album release Lupe Fiasco’s the Cool, Fiasco’s third album Lasers soared to the number-one seller on iTunes Tuesday and was sold out in stores the day of its release. Currently, his song The Show Goes On is 41 on Billboard’s Hot 100 list.

Far East Movement made Billboard’s Top Artists of the Year Chart in 2010 with its single Like a G6, which peaked at number one on October 31 and spent 26 weeks on the Billboard’s Hot 100 list.

Murphy said, “His new album came out yesterday (Tuesday, March 8). We’re in a similar situation with him that we were with Ludacris last year; we got him before his album was released, regaining his popularity. I’ve already listened to the album through about five times, and it has catchy songs (aside from the already released singles) that will be good live.”

Although CAB has tried to appeal to a variety of music preferences in the past, this year they will be building off of last year’s theme of bringing two hip-hop acts to campus. O’Keefe says they want to pick artists that will be most receptive to Bentley students.

Murphy added to this point. “Having two similar artists will allow for a cohesive show. Last year it really worked going from Jay Sean to Ludacris, and I think our pairing this year will work similarly. While CAB tries to appeal to as many people as possible with our choice of artist, having two different genres would provide rocky transitions,” he said.
Despite rumors generated by Pitbull’s fanbase website and the release of Fiasco’s potential signing weeks earlier on his website, CAB still finds value in being anonymous with its Spring Day choices.

O’Keefe said, “Besides building anticipation, we can’t announce the performers until the contract is finalized. [Fiasco] posted a group of upcoming college tour dates, but we were still unsure and unaware of his acceptance until it was finalized yesterday.”

CAB added to the hype and used its media sources this year to announce the show’s performers. CAB tweeted Tuesday, saying, “Drum roll please,” to prompt Bentley students for the Spring Day announcement.

In another effort to build anticipation, CAB hung up posters this week throughout the campus with a QR code that can also be found on Fiasco’s website.

“When you use your smartphone with its scanner and put it up to one of the posters, it reveals who’s coming for Spring Day,” said O’Keefe. “We posted signs in all the academic buildings and Seasons to see if anyone would pick up the message. It’s a way for people to talk about who’s coming for Spring Day, and once people realize what the codes say, the message eventually explodes.”

Bentley students tweeted about the QR codes and were impressed by CAB’s originality. Nupur Bhandari, a sophomore, tweeted to CAB’s Twitter page, saying, “I think it’s sick that @bentleyCAB used the QR reader to announce the Spring Day lineup.”

After looking at many artists for this year’s show, CAB chose the options that they feel would be most receptive to Bentley students. “We considered a large array of artists. We ultimately made our decision on these two artists because we felt that they would appeal to the largest percentage of the student population,” said Murphy.

Spring Day will be on April 30. The time has yet to be determined, but activities will commence later in the afternoon.

Spring Comedy Show features talented students and famed comedians

By Brenna O’Connell & Sindhu Palaniappan

Thanks to CAB and Comedy Chair Patrick Maguire, this year’s Comedy Show was an unforgettable one. The main attraction was YouTube sensation Bo Burnham, along with Comedy Central opener Shane Mauss and two Bentley students, Brandon Schug and Joshua Seiden.

The show opened with Seiden, a freshman and pledge of Alpha Epsilon Pi, fusing beat boxing and juggling together to get laughs from the audience. A Marketing major from Long Island, his nerves weren’t prevalent because he was so excited to be on stage. His comfort in the limelight showed that, even though his experience had only been a few kids’
birthday parties and talent shows.

The second student opener was junior Brandon Schug. His self-proclaimed “social awkwardness” served him well in his comedy style. Schug is a Marketing major from Connecticut who put himself out there by opening for two big comedians like Mauss and Burnham. Making rounds in comedy clubs in the area, such as the Middle East Restaurant and Nightclub, Schug says performing in front of his peers is a unique experience. Doing a stand up routine and playing a little bit on his feet, Schug really got the audience laughing with his unique sense of humor.

Mauss, a seasoned comedian, was on next. Since he caught his big break in 2007, Mauss has been featured on Comedy Central, The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien and Jimmy Kimmel Live, as well as festivals across the world. At first, Mauss seemed to test the waters with his audience, but as his bit progressed, it was clear he was more confident and took risks; well, as confident as a self-deprecating comedian can be.

He loves to save “the edgy stuff for young college audiences, since comedy clubs and bars are an entirely different animal.” By the end, Mauss was tackling asshole jokes and drunk texting, which turned out to be a great segue to the outrageous Bo Burnham. On March 9, Mauss will reunite with O’Brien for the first time since O’Brien’s new show.
When Burnham first appeared, his introductory music blared, setting the tone. The intense music and his moves were enticing, awkward, creepy and dangerous, in that order.

In a sit-down interview after the show, Burnham shared the inspiration and reasoning behind his flamboyant, provocative show (as well as a brazen apology to that student).

Throughout high school, Burnham was a thespian at St. John’s Prep in Danvers, MA. In middle school, he was an analytical mathlete (a la “New Math”), eventually abandoning that in favor of a self-proclaimed “lazy route.” While not necessarily a “loser” in high school, he did identify with that group.

“I mean, I was never pushed into lockers or anything, but I really hate the same people losers hated,” he said. This is reflected in his victimization of himself in many of his pieces.

“Art is dead,” he said. “99 percent of people don’t care about the goodness of some act, but just the profit.” It’s this passion that fuels him to work so furiously at having a genuine show of entertainment value. “Sometimes I don’t know why I get so much praise; it feels like I’m robbing people… Of course this show was free for you guys.”

Everything Burnham does and says comes from his philosophy and ultimate vision for his craft. Influenced by counterparts in Europe, Burnham is in search for the ultimate theatrical experience. It is neither the rapping nor the singing that is his true passion, but instead writing – this is evident in his witty comedic style. He admits that his earlier work may have been crude and offensive in order to get a few laughs, but now he realizes that was a cheap way to go about it.

“Anyone can get up there and say, ‘Snuggies,’ and have the crowd laughing without even saying a joke,” said Burnham. But he is concerned with earning his laughs. “Comedy is about not getting what you thought you got. It’s like the King Lear model,” (the higher something is, the harder it falls). “If I can take something sacred and dark and make people laugh, that’s an accomplishment.”

With that being said, “There is definitely a moral compass to comedy,” said Burnham. This led to his own realization that, for example, his Helen Keller jokes were just too easy and in poor taste.

Presently, he adamantly defends his material, saying that nothing is meant to offend. “It’s about understanding the truth of what I’m saying.”

When asked about his journey from the humble confines of his bedroom on YouTube, Burnham compares it to “being a really tall midget”(whatever that means). The biggest challenge he had was transforming his style to performance-friendly material.

Burnham is known for his incredibly witty jokes, which usually require thought to process and understand. On YouTube, viewers have the luxury of watching videos multiple times, reading along and laughing once it all comes together. In live performances, however, the absence of such things forced Burnham to revamp his style. Instead, he “piles jokes on top of jokes,” so that the listener will catch maybe one out of every three jokes, but are still laughing anyway.

Burnham appreciates the respect that the Bentley community showed him. (He hates nothing more than drunken hecklers, although they keep him on his toes.) Improvisation is a huge part of his appeal – as evidenced by his interactions with Bentley Police Officer David.

“Making the show something different keeps me from killing myself, and the audience feels good knowing they saw something unique,” said Burnham.

Passing Showers
On Thursday, February 24 at 5:40 p.m., a student in Miller called in reporting a leaky dorm ceiling. He had no clear lead as to where the dripping was coming from, but he anticipated that a lengthy shower may have been being enjoyed directly above. Facilities were notified and the rainy conditions soon passed.

Smooth Criminal
On Thursday evening at 6:54 p.m., officers received a call that things were not all well in the lobby bathroom on the first floor of the Bentley Library. Recent activity resulted in a large clogging problem in one of the stalls. It was almost the perfect crime.

Infestation
On February 24 at approximately 10:30 p.m., a student called to report ants crawling ferociously in her room. Lucky for her it was in her room, not in her pants.

Cab Fare Evasion
On Friday, February 25 at 12:19 a.m., officers received a call from a hard-working member of the local transportation community that two female students had ran out of his cab without paying their $47.05 fee. The driver reported that they had sprinted into the Fenway building as soon as he pulled up, almost as if it was planned.
Officers spoke with students in the area to see if anyone had seen the mad dashers and might be able to identify the two parties, but they were unable to find anyone who could provide this information. The driver was told that he would be contacted if any new leads were found.

Cab Fare Evasion: Bentley Students Wouldn’t Do That Twice, Right?
On Wednesday night at 7:05 p.m., the station received a visit from an irate taxi driver explaining a situation he was having with a Bentley student. According to reports, earlier in the night the two had formed an agreement that the male student would be transported to and from the city for a flat rate charge each way. As the driver pulled into their final destination on campus, the student mentioned that he had no cash and would have to go into the ATM before he could pay him. Trusting that he would return, the driver agreed.

Unfortunately, something must have come up, because the male student never came back with the cash. Having his contact information, the clever driver gave him a call but was immediately sent to voicemail, which he carefully listened to and extracted the student’s name, enabling the officers to identify the student. The student will be making some sort of resolution for this issue, and he will be judicially charged with larceny and violation of university rules.

Foolish Freshmen
On February 23 at 10:12 a.m., officers spotted a vehicle in the Trees parking lot with no trace of an authorized sticker. After some investigative work, the car was determined to be owned by a freshman student. Knowing this first year student was way out of line, the tow company was swiftly notified. The student will be charged with vehicle violations, as well as being uncooperative with personnel. It turns out he had approached the station the week before, but was denyed the decal.

Snack Attack
A sergeant responded to a call last Wednesday at 9:15 p.m. about a vending machine that had been left open on the first floor of Smith. Hungry lurkers took advantage of the plethora of free treats until officers were able to arrive and label the machine as “out of service.” Dispatch contacted P&J Vending to advise them of the situation.

The Forbidden Forest
At 1:30 a.m. on February 23, while a Bentley officer was out and about on patrol, two drunken gentleman were in the midst of a fantastic journey down Forest Street. According to local witnesses, the pair of males were proceeding down the street in a drunken stupor and didn’t seem to have a clue as to where they were going.
Once the Bentley officer exited his vehicle and spoke to the dynamic duo, one of the males tried to explain that he lived on Lower Campus and was simply making the trip back to his dorm room on foot. However, since the two students were actually headed in the direction of North Campus instead of Lower Campus, the officer decided that a public intoxication charge was in order.

No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problem
On Monday, February 21 at 4:42 a.m., officers were dispatched to Slade Hall in response to a report of someone who had passed out in the women’s bathroom. Once the officers arrived on the scene, they were met by a staff member who said that the passed out person had shown no signs of movement so far and was missing his shoes. Fortunately, the officers were able to use their expert training to awaken the fallen young man and immediately began to ask him questions in hopes of figuring out how he had gotten there.

According to the sleepy student, he was “visiting a female friend,” but had forgotten the room number. After a few more minutes of deliberation, the officers decided that since the male was fully coherent, the best course of action would be to help him find his shoes and send him on his merry way to Fenway.

Written By: Jon McColgan

Comedians Christian Finnegan (and Chris Hardwick) in fall show

Written by: Sindhu Palaniappan

The Campus Activities Board (CAB) is throwing its annual Comedy Show on Saturday, October 16 this year, and it’s promised to be a hit! Pat Maguire, a sophomore, is the Comedy Chair on CAB this year and has worked with a committee to put the show together. He noted, “For a show like this, you’d need to pay a lot outside at a club or venue.” But it’s free for Bentley students to come check out the two comedians they have lined up.

Christian Finnegan is a stand-up comedian by profession who occasionally appears on television and writes for fun. He was one of the original cast members in VH1’s Best Week Ever. He has also appeared on the Chappelle Show as Chad in The Mad Real World sketch. Not only did he have his own special on Comedy Central, Comedy Central Presents: Christian Finnegan, but he also frequents the network often. He has dipped his foot into movies as well, and he has produced a CD and a DVD with Comedy Central and Warner Bros, respectively. Two for Flinching and Au Contraire have both been huge hits.

Chris Hardwick is also a professional stand-up comedian and a self-proclaimed nerd. He hosts channel G4’s Web Soup and Attack of the Show. He also writes for Wired Magazine. He is a wildly popular blogger for Nerd.com and holds one of the top ten spots on iTunes’ comedy podcasts. Some might recognize him for Just for Laughs or Coachella, and he performs some of his stand-up routines at comedy and music festivals alike.

After frequent YouTube visits, website checks, heavy reviewing and some deliberation, Maguire and his committee chose these two comedians because they were sure to put on a good show and had plenty of experience in the comedy field, especially in stand-up performances. CAB wanted to change it up a little this year by having both comedians be professional stand-up comedians, as opposed to television or movie comedians who tend to not do as well on stage when it comes to stand-up. Each comedian is expected to perform at least a half-hour set with a lot of audience interaction.

The doors open at 7 and the show starts at 7:30 p.m. on October 16, so head on down to the Koumantzalis Auditorium for some laughs! It’s free for students and $5 for nonstudents, but the auditorium always fills up fast so get there early!

Written by: Dan Merica

The Campus Activity Board’s (CAB) spring semester comedy show will feature Judah Friedlander, who plays writer Frank Rossitano on NBC’s hit comedy 30 Rock. According to CAB Comedy Chair Kevin Penley, Friedlander’s comedy act, entitled “Judah Friedlander is the World Champion,” will be the headliner of the February 18 act.

“Judah is a familiar face and his name, because of 30 Rock, will be familiar with people,” said Penley. He went on to say that, personally, he is “really excited” about Judah’s show.

Friedlander has been featured in over twenty movies, including Meet the Parents, Zoolander, Wet Hot American Summer and American Splendor. He has also received acclaim for his roles on VH1’s Best Week Ever and HBO’s Curb Your Enthusiasm.

“In the past we have found the people on TV shows go over well with Bentley, and I expect it to be pretty full,” said Penley.

The 40-year-old Friedlander has been pursuing standup for 18-years, and according to Punchline Magazine, he “effectively works the crowd with his laugh-out-loud-worthy retorts.” Friedlander recently announced that he plans to release his first comedy album in 2010.

According to his biography, Friedlander is “a great athlete, gets tons of chicks & is a role model to children. And he’s better than you at everything.”

CAB will also be promoting this comedy show under the guidelines of the new Green Initiative that the organization is taking up. “We won’t actually be using professional posters for this event,” said Penley. “We will be using Facebook, Twitter and also A-Frame boards around campus,“ he finished.

Aside from his work in front of the camera, Friedlander is recognized by his witty, homemade trucker hats. He makes up all the sayings on the hats, which are sold on his website and include phrases like, “Champion of the World,” “World Runner-Up,” and “Regional Semifinalist.”

In addition to hats on his website, Friedlander sells a spaceship for $10,000,000 that will, “make you cool and popular,” as well as a Judah-Bot, “a full life-size robot of Judah… Great for lying around the house and doing nothing” for $1,000,000. Friedlander also sells a nude picture of himself for $500; however, the website states, “SOLD OUT! Sorry ladies.”

During the interview, Penley spent some time looking around Judah’s website and laughed-out-loud when he saw some of the goods he was selling. “I would imagine that anything he does in his life has some humor in it,” said Penley.

Friedlander is the second NBC comedy writer to come to Bentley in the last three comedy shows.  Past shows have included Patton Oswalt in the fall of 2009, B.J. Novak, a writer for NBC’s The Office, in the spring of 2009,  and Stephen Lynch in the fall of 2008.

The show will be held in Koumantzelis Auditorium on Thursday, February 18. Doors open at 7 p.m. and the show will start at 7:30 PM. Admission is free with a Bentley ID and five dollars without a Bentley ID.

Written by: Dan Caponetti

A musical artist that the “vast majority” of students would recognize almost performed at Bentley this weekend. The Campus Activities Board (CAB) recently saw months of work towards a fall concert go to waste because of contractual disagreements between the two parties.

The identity of the artist would not be revealed by CAB or the Office of Student Activities. Two major problems contributed to the falling through.

The first disagreement between the two sides involved a radius clause in the school’s contract. The clause states that the artist cannot perform publicly somewhere else within 48 hours before the show as well as 24 hours after without the University’s consent.

They would also need permission to perform within 90 miles of Waltham in the three weeks before the show.

Jessica Kenerson, advisor to CAB, claimed this clause was necessary because, “Bentley students might go to that (public show) without realizing that we are having them on campus. So, it would affect our turn out.”

Secondly, the artist requested that no student labor be used to set up the show. CAB revised this part of the contract, but to no avail. At that point, with both sides refusing to budge, CAB had no choice but to cancel. Kenerson said that, “We couldn’t afford to hire the amount of stagehands we would need to build the stage, do the sound, and do the lighting. Usually we have 40 or 50 students helping out to build that stuff.”

With no student labor, CAB would have paid an enormous expense in hiring professional help. This proved to be an unreasonable expectation for an organization with a contracting budget.

Kenerson also stressed that this is not a reflection of CAB. She says that student organizers put in a lot of hard work plan the show and that the unfortunate circumstances were beyond their control. In the end, no money went to waste; CAB returned all of the funding allotted to them for this event to Student Activities.

There is hope, however, that this artist will be coming back to Bentley. According to Kenerson, there is a “50/50 chance” that they could play at an event like Spring Day. For now, CAB will be hosting the original opener for the show, Andrew Belle, on Saturday, November 7 in the Blue Line Pub.

Written by: Alison Kane

Blackjack dealers, craps tables, roulette, and Texas Hold ‘em. Groups gathered around the tables and gambled away their cash, hoping to win big at Bentley’s own Las Vegas.

On Friday night, the Campus Activities Board (CAB) sponsored “Casino Night” in the Back Bay. With music blasting at full power, dance lights flashing around the room, and professionally dressed dealers manning the gambling, the conference rooms were transformed into a quite convincing casino.

For those intimidated by the “professional” feel to the evening, the dealers were friendly and easy to talk to if anyone had a question about how the game was played. “All the games were new to me,” says freshman Stef Lund, “but the people running the games were really cool and walked you through it.”

In addition to the game tables, there was an oxygen bar, another feature adding to the Vegas-feel of the evening. Looking like a contraption from a science-fiction movie, four “flavors” of oxygen were bubbling in containers. Students received hoses to plug up their noses and hook-up to the machine which pumped filtered oxygen into their lungs.

The oxygen bartender explained the purpose of the machine said, “[It was] a good way to relieve stress. It’s really relaxing. We do this a lot for students around finals time.” However, most students seemed to be more interested with the games than relaxing.

Each player was given $50,000 of fake money to spend on chips at any of the game tables. At the end of the night, chips could be redeemed for raffle tickets for a chance to win a variety of prizes ranging from and iPod Touch to Red Sox tickets.

Whether or not students had a time-tested strategy in gambling or trusted solely beginner’s luck, Casino Night proved to be a good way to spend a Friday night.

For those not up for spending a night in Vegas, CAB also sponsored a tailgating party before the football game. With admission to the football game, students could enjoy steak sandwiches, sausage grinders, fried dough, and fried Oreos totally free of charge.

This pre-game event enticed students to the athletic fields to watch the undefeated Falcons take on tough competition American International College. Even those who are not usually big sports fans stayed for the game after enjoying the food.

While students seemed to appreciate the various greasy sandwiches, the biggest hit of the evening was the fried dough and fried Oreo cart. The long line never seemed to dwindle as students were craving something deliciously fried.

Conversation while waiting usually consisted of groups of friends arguing over who would get which sugary treat. While some students were turned off by the thought of Oreos dipped in batter, others were insistent that these were the greatest thing since sliced bread.

“It was delicious,” says freshman Jackie Marques, who had her first fired Oreo last Friday. “The chocolate melted in your mouth. It was probably fattening, too, but I don’t care.”

With fingers covered in powdered sugar, students made their way into the stadium to watch Bentley’s thrilling victory over AIC.

The CAB sponsored events kicked off the start of the fall semester, and brought together the campus for the first big events of the year. Whether students were looking for an old fashioned game of football or a night in Vegas, the activities made for a terrific evening.

Written by: Dan Merica

In an interview with The Vanguard, Kevin Penley, the Campus Activities Board comedy chair, announced that comedian Patton Oswalt will be coming to Bentley University for the annual Fall 2009 CAB Comedy Show.

An entertainer with a variation of talents, Oswalt has seen success in a multitude of outlets. On the big screen, Oswalt played the lead voice of “Remy the Rat,” in Disney-Pixar’s Oscar-winning blockbuster Ratatouille, as well as “Paul Aufiero” in the 2009 release Big Fan. In addition, Oswalt played the role “Spence” on the Emmy-nominated CBS series King of Queens for nine consecutive seasons.

Oswalt, who began performing standup comedy in the late 1980’s, has released three CDs worth of material, the most recent being “My Weakness is Strong.” His topics vary greatly, ranging from the lighthearted to the serious, with select bits even touching on such controversial topics as politics and religion.

It was that range, of both talent and catalog, which drew the CAB Comedy Committee to Oswalt. “I hope that Patton’s national fame and Comedy Central acclaimed talent in addition to his latest movie, Big Fan, will attract students to the show,” said Vice President Mariela Spillari.

Penley specifically noted that his role on King of Queens and his numerous comedy CDs were reasons for the interest from CAB. “People know him from a broad range of things,” said Penley, “not just from Comedy Central specials.”

Oswalt’s appearance later this semester will mark the second year of a new format for CAB’s comedy performances. Before the fall of 2007, CAB structured their comedic budget so that Bentley students were privy to one comedic show per year, with names like D.L. Hughley and Bob Saget playing the expansive Dana Center.

In 2007, CAB reformed their comedy budget, moving the shows to the smaller, more intimate Koumantzelis Auditorium. It was this move that allowed CAB to add one more comedy show to their yearly schedule. Last year, CAB invited Stephen Lynch in the fall and B.J. Novak in the spring, and both events were major hits with the student population.

“Since moving to Koumantzelis, the comedians have been sold out,” said Penley. “I have felt that the auditorium has added to the shows, you are right there, it feels like more of a comedy club.”

With the overwhelming success of last year’s two comedy shows, Penley and the rest of CAB were given a heavy act to follow this year.

The decision on Oswalt, which goes through “a vote of different board members,” according to Penley, was not completely unanimous. CAB President Andrew Leffler admitted to The Vanguard that he would have preferred a different comedian.

When asked, Penley refused to divulge the names of other considered comedians, saying “I don’t want to give any of them away, because we may get them for the spring.”

Penley and the rest of CAB are confident that the success seen last year, with both comedy shows being near sold out, will be repeated this year.

Oswalt will perform at Bentley on October 17, 2009, with the Koumantzelis Auditorium doors opening at 7:00 p.m. and the show starting at 7:30 p.m. The show is free for Bentley students courtesy of the Student Activity Fee and five dollars for the general public.

Written by: Lindsay Sauvé

Fans of The Office and Flight of the Conchords waited patiently outside of Lindsay Hall this past frigid February weekend. Some waited for two hours just to ensure they would have a great seat to watch two renowned comedians perform at Bentley, with the tension in the foyer of the auditorium rowdy and students quoting The Office in anticipation for the two-man act.

Comedians BJ Novak and James Smith performed in CAB’s second comedy event of the year, following Stephen Lynch’s performance in November.  Koumantzelis Auditorium was completely filled to its 480 person capacity last Saturday night, in fact the only logistical problem of the night was that nearly 100 students were turned away due to capacity problems. This series was providing the chance for Bentley students to laugh off the long week of classes and work.

Smith started the show by warming up the crowd with his relevant and hysterical standup. He discussed the financial bailout bills as well as Oprah’s influence in this past election. He also commented on the irony of his name and noted that his mother must have used “the example” on the birth certificate form. He also discussed the financial bailout, including AIG’s exorbitant vacations and his questioning about the losses of funding, asking “who has the money? I know I don’t have it. And looking around I’m pretty sure you don’t have it either.”

BJ Novak’s act started with the recognition of a fan’s “Fire Guy” sign, a reference to an episode he wrote from The Office. Overall, his standup featured dry humor, but lacked the relevancy that was illustrated in Smith’s performance. Novak’s act included a puppet, as well as an interactive act where the audience judged the quality of his one-liners.

At the end of his act, he opened up to the audience through a question and answer forum. During this, Bentley students asked questions about The Office, Novak’s acting career as well as personal relationships with cast members such as Steve Carrell, Rainn Wilson, Mindy Kaling, and Creed Bratton.

Novak also discussed his favorite episodes stating he had been thinking about it, but he was torn between “A Benihana Christmas” and “The Injury,” where Carell, Boss Michael Scott, burns his foot on a George Foreman Grill accidently, in an attempt to wake up to the smell of bacon before work.

When asked about off-set relations, Novak talked about how great it is to work with Carell, and Wilson is just as funny off set as he is when he’s playing Dwight on The Office. He said his favorite person to work with is Bratton, simply because “he is always Creed.” Questions were asked about his on-set relationship with Kaling (Kelly) who he has been in an on and off relationship on the show. He seemed hesitant to answer the personal questions, simply stating she’s a great girl.

Novak also said he has not been in recent episodes of The Office because he was filming Quentin Tarantino’s upcoming film Inglorious Basterds.

Both comedians were kind enough to meet with the CAB e-board as well as members to sign posters and take pictures.

After the show, James Smith discussed his inspirations as well as his advice to Bentley students. A businessman by profession, Smith left the private sector and law school to pursue his passion in comedy, following such inspirations Chris Rock, Eddy Izzard, David Letterman, as well as Jerry Seinfeld.

When asked how business students should go about following in his path if they have a passion for comedy, he joked “don’t” but later went on to say he would tell students to stay involved with campus activities such as debate clubs and open mic nights.

Smith, an Australian native and guest on the HBO series Flight of the Conchords was the opener for Novak. Smith grew up in Sydney, and is a banking and finance lawyer by profession. Smith was the winner of Australia’s Star Quest in 2001. Aside from stand-up comedy, Smith is also a permanent writer and performer on a national radio station in Australia

When asked about the current influx of Australian humor and comedy in America, he said he was “very impressed” with the talent in Flight of the Concords as well as another HBO series Summer Heights High. Smith was extremely humble, stating that he admires writers outside of stand up, and can’t imagine how laborious it is for Christopher Lilley to play three characters in Summer.

Novak, CAB’s main comedy act, is best known from his role on the Emmy nominated television series The Office, as well as a writer and a co-producer of several episodes of the show, including “The Fire,” where his character Ryan Howard starts a fire in the office by overcooking a cheesy pita. Novak grew up in Newton, Massachusetts and also attended Harvard University, majoring in English and Spanish where he started his stand up career. In addition to The Office, Novak has appeared in the films Unaccompanied Minors, Reign Over Me and Knocked Up.

Both Smith and Novak pleased the crowd in their own ways, ending CAB’s weekend of events with a bang.

Dear Editor,

Spring semester after spring semester, the Campus Activities Board hosts its signature give-a-way event, where thousands upon thousands of dollars are shelled out in a single night of luck and prizes. We call this free lunch by a new name each year, but whether it’s Super Bingo, Blingo Bingo, or Get Free Stuff Bingo, let’s call it Greedy Bingo.

This is arguably my favorite event all year, and much of the student body seems to hold similar feelings about Greedy Bingo, as year after year, the stands are packed and everyone gets into Bingo mode. Who doesn’t like an event where if you understand five letters and about eighty numbers, as well the difference between red and white, you have the potential to win flat screen televisions, iPods, and Celtic tickets?

Sure our money paid for the prizes, as it’s all funded by that wonderful student activity fee, but you don’t think about that while at Bingo. You think about how many squares you are away from screaming Bingo, being shocked that you somehow won, and walking (or apparently running) to the caller’s table to claim your prize or face off against the other lucky Bingo yellers. The point is that everyone loves Greedy Bingo.
That’s the problem.

Look, I know this is a business school, and I know why we’re all here. It could be summed up really into one word: money. You can sing and dance and try to say you chose Bentley for the campus, or the area, or the small classes, or even simply because of your Ambassador being cute or something, but at the end of the day, you chose to attend an elite business school. Business would be the optimal word there. Why did you choose to go to a business school? Simple: you want to get a job after college and make money. That’s what businesses (are supposed to) do.

There’s nothing wrong with that; obviously I chose this school as well, and don’t regret it for an instant. But my point is that we all hear those statistics about 99% of Bentley students finding jobs or significant commitments within six months of graduating, and how affluent accountants and Wall Street wiz-kids are, and it makes us salivate. The recession doesn’t change any of these facts, because it didn’t hit the fan until after we all chose Bentley.

We’re all out for the big pay day, and nothing says it more than Greedy Bingo. At Bentley, most sporting events feature empty stands, performances by students organizations rarely feature a full or even half house, but when we here about a friggin’ Bingo game, we come running.

And we don’t play like the civilized people we are in interviews and presentations. Oh no; we’re vicious. We boo and shout in anger at the winners that stole our win; we cry out in fury as the number caller “refuses” to call the one number we’ve needed for the last five games. Heaven forbid someone mistakenly call out Bingo and not have it, as they’re likely to lose a couple friends that evening

We get so enthralled in a board game for valuable prizes, but we don’t care at all about our teams until they hit playoffs or championships. We don’t care to support the tireless work of countless organizations trying to entertain or stimulate us. In fact, can you remember the last event you went to that didn’t have a major incentive for you to attend: whether it be food, a cash bar, raffles, prizes, or some other way of compensating you for your time?

At Bentley, we truly are business thinkers. There must be an incentive to care about the vandalism on campus (which is increased punishments), an incentive to attend an event (even if it’s to fight cancer or poverty), and an incentive to give a damn about anything. Even Service Learning has to offer paid positions, class credit, or a special diploma certification to corral us into helping our community. City Year has to offer $20,000 scholarships and the amount of free stuff that organizations have to give out at events just to get attention is almost sickening when you add up the money spent of all those trinkets.

What does it say to you that they always wait until at least half of the sporting contest is over before handing out the t-shirts or sweatshirts that were promised you in return for your attendance? How often do you hear, “Let’s go to the game, there’s free [insert item plastered with “Bentley”]!”?

Some of you reading this are gripping the paper, ready to scream that I’m an idiot for saying this, because capitalism itself is a system of incentives. Of course it is, and of course it’s human nature to want incentives, but when you talk to your friends at other schools or to administrators who attended or worked at other schools before coming here, you’ll find something out: at other schools, people don’t need to hear or read the words “pizza,” “raffle,” “prize,” or see $$$ in order to get interested in something.

Greed is good, as Gordon Gekko would say; it drives our economy, building innovation after innovation, and sparks healthy competition that provides for economic growth. But to me, Greedy Bingo reveals the worst in our nature as business students and perhaps as people in general. From throwing cards into the crowd without remorse (hitting bystanders in the face, head, eye…..and that’s just the people I heard complaining on the way out), to hating when others win and making it abundantly clear to everyone within hearing distance that we’re upset, to acting as if we’re owed a prize or as if the game was rigged because we didn’t win a game of absolute chance, we’re out for ourselves at Bingo and we’re not quiet about it.

Never mind that we might hurt someone by flinging the cards blindly into the crowd. Never mind the fact that someone would have to pick up those damn cards after we tossed them onto the polished wooden court. Never mind that CAB handed out over $5,000 worth of prizes (I’m just estimating, it was $10,000 last year) and got nothing but a mess to clean up as a thank you.

From arrogance to apathy towards the plight of others to greed, our worst colors were flying high at the Dana Center on Friday night, just like every year. We cared about ourselves and our own winnings; we cared about having our laughs and good time, especially at the expense of others.

That makes us human maybe, but I’d rather think that we’re better than that when push comes to shove; that we care about our neighbor, even if we don’t know him or her well. I’d rather think that we’re at Bingo for a good time, and that we’re busy when all the other campus events are happening.

But we’re not, and somehow that’s okay with us, myself included. I love Greedy Bingo just like everyone else does, despite showing off how greedy we really are. I skip events all the time, and I wish that I received a tenth of the emails that I get advertising them.

When it comes to Bingo though, should I think about all this before I go to next year’s Bingo Extravaganza, which may have an even cornier name? Should I reconsider going and just sit in my room or go off campus, avoiding the game all together? Would it be better to delude myself that I’m not as greedy as everyone else and that Greedy Bingo doesn’t matter to me? Probably…until the thought that must hit every Bentley student’s mind before doing anything comes across my mind…
But what’s in it for me?

Written by: Vanguard Editoral Board

This past weekend reminded us how campus-wide events can not only provide fun and amusement, but both deal with larger issues on campus or actually call in question how the campus deals with issues.
On Friday evening, we had Blingo Bingo, which must be noted as one of the smoothest games of CAB Bingo that anyone has seen since coming to Bentley. The games were run efficiently and quickly, and the multiple winners were whittled down to a single champion in no time at all.

Now at first glance, we’re concerned that with an economic crisis looming on everyone’s minds, a massive Bingo game with thousands of dollars in prizes being shelled out may not be the best way to practice fiscal responsibility. Could this money serve a better purpose supporting an underfunded organization or event that strives to support a good cause or provide an educational opportunity for students?

Perhaps, but in the end, CAB did a nice job paring down spending with its prizes, as it still offered valuable prizes, but didn’t seem to waste money on ridiculously expensive giveaways. Bingo brings our campus together for a good night of fun and exciting chance, and though there’s always some negatives to the Bingo event (just ask the recipients of a Bingo card to the face).

Maybe the average student even feels cheated by the lesser prizes, but when Bentley is tightening its belt financially, does it make sense to waste our activity fee on a two thousand dollar prize for one student? Probably not.

CAB followed their well-run Blingo Bingo Friday with the comedic double-header of The Office star BJ Novak and Flight of the Conchords guest James Smith. Smith put on a surprisingly hilarious set that had the audience practically in tears, while BJ Novak was a tad underwhelming though still funny, but the aspect of this event that is perhaps most important to comment on: what the evening accomplished for students.
There is no doubt that here at Bentley, we live immersed in a highly competitive culture where stress and anxiety over everything from group projects for GB courses to internship spots and job openings is rampant. It’s wonderful that academic work is so important to students here, and it’s this work ethic that makes Bentley students so attractive in interviews with world renowned firms. But don’t you ever get tired of working your ass off?

As business students, we work ourselves to the bone week after week, semester after semester, and though we may party and have a good time on weekends, it’s nice for a campus-wide organization like CAB to be able to make the campus laugh and have a good time without passing out Solo cups.

For no charge at all, students were able to see two professional comedians that may not carry the comedic weight of George Carlin or Lewis Black, but BJ Novak is a key part of a major network’s signature show, while James Smith showed that he can be downright side-splitting and has been on one of HBO’s top-rated shows. That’s not half bad for a school of Bentley’s size.

Between the stress of the expanding recession that appears to be heading for catastrophe, which makes a job search like looking for water in a desert (esp. if you’re a finance-anything major), terrorism and war all over the world, and the academic burden every Bentley student has to carry, we live in a pretty unfunny world.  Kudos to CAB for proving that laughter is sometimes the best remedy for times that aren’t so hilarious.

It’s a Friday night. The week is finally over, and you just glance at the little mound of work you have as you push it aside. So now what? You have 3 nights ahead of you to do whatever you want. For many college students, the thought process may just about end here. They will grab their keys, rush over to their friends’ dorm and spend the night away partaking in “recreational activities”. But what if there was something relaxing to do on campus? After all, it is conveniently located right here, and if nothing else, you can save yourself the gasoline bill. Well fortunately enough, once every month, you have that option. At around the end of each month, about 750-1000 students gather in the Student Center for a night of food, games, and the chance to forget all memories of schoolwork, all while still being in a campus setting.

The occasion? BADASS, or Bentley After Dark According To Student Selection Recently, of course. Starting in their second semester as an organized school activity, BADASS hopes to give students the chance to relax in “a non-alcoholic and late night setting” said Christine Olson, an e-board representative.

And so far it has been doing just that. After all, alcohol isn’t exactly a scarce resource if you go looking for it. So why not end your search right now and spend the night away with your friends doing DDR, picture key chains, all with a live band under black lights?

Well, on 24th of February from 11-2 a.m., you can.

But something will be different. And while you may not necessarily notice it while in the Student Center, you have probably heard about it. This semester, B.A.D.A.S.S. has become a part of C.A.B., the Campus Activities Board for reasons that are much more involved than the convenience alone.

Originally, B.A.D.A.S.S. had gotten funding from two main sources: student life and the AIA, which gives money to student organizations. Technically speaking however, B.A.D.A.S.S. was not a student-run organization. You can guess how thrilled the other student organizations were about that. So, the only real remedy to the situation was for B.A.D.A.S.S. to become a part of the C.A.B. tree, thereby making it a student-run organization and eligible for the funds.

With the switch behind them, B.A.D.A.S.S. still wants to make one thing loud and clear, “we are still B.A.D.A.S.S., even if we are a part of CAB.”, said Lauren Gotimer. So, while their budget and club account number might have changed, the goal behind the club has not. They still are committed to providing alcohol-free entertainment for the Bentley community and have many plans for the upcoming semester. As such, they are always looking for student input at their meetings every Tuesday at 9 p.m. during their meetings. At the moment, they are planning for their future events in March and April, and are open to any and all suggestions.