Police Logs

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Written by: Gaelen Austin-LaFrance & Garren Hilow

Smoking the Wacky Tobacky
Officers were on patrol around Slade Hall Tuesday at approximately 6 p.m. when they smelled something a little funky. As they approached the cement stairs, the officers witnessed two parties exhale smoke and throw something onto the ground.  They smelled the odor of burnt marijuana in the air. The students informed the police that the smell was from someone who had just passed by smoking and hadn’t shared with them at all! The students went on to claim that what they had thrown before the officers arrived was a cigarette and that they had not been smoking weed. When the students searched for but could not find the cigarette butt, officers began to get suspicious. During the search for the mystery cigarette, a marijuana blunt roach was found.  Eventually, one of the students admitted it was theirs.  Both will be charged with possession and use of a controlled substance.  The more rambunctious student will be additionally charged with being uncooperative with administrative personnel.

Boot and Rally
A Student Center employee called the police at 2:30 a.m. Saturday morning with a report of an intoxicated female vomiting in the bathroom. When officers arrived, they found her in the stall and asked her to come out.  It was determined that she was sober enough to take care of herself and was returned to her room.  She will be charged with an underage alcohol violation.

Larry Looselips Spills the Beans
While taking a lovely Saturday evening stroll down the back side of Maple Hall, officers overheard a male yelling, “Hey, do you want bottles or cans?” The student walked straight out of Maple and was shocked to see the waiting officers. The police told him that they had overheard what he had said and asked for his ID.  He handed over his Bentley ID as well as a Florida driver’s license that showed he was underage. Curious as to how the student was expecting to purchase alcohol, they then asked him whether or not he owned a fake ID.  He was surprisingly cooperative and produced a fake Nevada license with his name and picture on it.  He also admitted that he was going to purchase alcohol for his friends. He will be charged with possession of a false ID, planning to furnish alcohol for minors and a violation of University rules.

Masked Bandits Terrorize Neighborhood
Wednesday morning, Bentley Police got a call from residents on Wood Cliff Road reporting five males suspiciously walking through the wooded area of Waltham High School.  They told police that two of the males were blindfolded and that the other three were carrying rope. When police arrived and found the students, none of them were blindfolded or carrying rope.  They informed officers they had been up all night working on a project, and upon finishing, decided to go for a walk.  They were looking for a path that they had been told led to a good place to smoke. The police asked if they had been blindfolded and the students said, “No, but someone was wearing a skull cap… We have nothing to hide.”  The students were charged with suspicious behavior for disturbing the residents on the access road.

Water balloons, $2.50. Security Cameras, $5,000,000. Catching suspects on tape, priceless.
Thursday night at around 7 p.m., reports of people throwing water balloons from the second floor of Fenway Hall started coming into the police station. The dispatcher on duty was able to use high-tech spy cameras to identify which room the balloons were coming from. When officers went to put a stop to the shenanigans, they counted as many as 15 balloon marks on the ground and colorful latex carnage strewn all over. When the police located the room and knocked on the door, two students stepped out into the hallway. They both admitted to throwing the balloons, and one exclaimed, “I didn’t know it was illegal to throw water balloons.” The officer explained that they posed a serious safety risk to the campus and that they needed to cease fire at once. They then searched the apartment and recovered one full water balloon that had not yet been hurled. The students will both be charged with disorderly conduct and causing a safety risk. During the interrogation officers noticed three beer cans on the table of the room. One of the students was 21 but the other was underage. Because they were both emanating an odor of alcohol, the underage student also slapped with an underage alcohol violation.

Ultra ID Protection
Last Wednesday just after lunchtime, a resident of Cedar Hall called into the station to report a curious discovery. She had arrived back at her dorm to find an ID inside a condom taped to her door. Officers removed it from the door and took it back to the station where it is being kept as evidence for this case.

It was later discovered that the same ID was related to a prior incident. Here’s what we now know:  A student spray painted “F*** U” on a pillar outside of Cedar earlier this week. The student was identified, and subsequently busted. That student claims he was framed in the spraypaint incident and that his ID was missing at the time. It has since been determined  that the ID inside the condom was, in fact, a red herring intended to throw Campus Police off the trail. The case is considered open.

Tagged as: Gaelen Austin-LaFrance, Garren Hilow, News, Police Logs