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Written by: Gaelen Austin-LaFrance & Garren Hilow
As you buckle down and study for finals, take a break and take a look back at some of the debauchery and drunken escapades from this semester. We hope you’ve enjoyed reading the logs as much as we’ve enjoyed writing them. Happy holidays!
Is it cold in here?
Early Sunday morning, officers reported to Kresge Hall for a report of a male exposing himself. A group of female students was standing in the hallway when a opened the door to a room pulled down his pants to mid-thigh and exposed his genitals, then shut the door. One of the females knocked on the door, one of the residents informed her that the student who exposed himself wasn’t a Bentley student and was the guest of someone who was asleep. When officers questioned the suspect, they found him to have the odor of alcohol on his breath and denied taking his pants down in front of the group. The nudist failed the sobriety test because he used a wall for balance and was placed into protective custody and was taken to Waltham Police Department for booking. His host will be charged with a guest policy violation.
The Bread Bandit
Last Monday, at approximately 7p.m., one keen-eyed Sodexho employee caught a student attempting to smuggle food out of seasons. The student was quickly cornered by Sodexho management and asked to open his backpack. He kindly agreed and they discovered a package of bagels, a loaf of bread and a few bananas. The bread bandit was then escorted to the police station where a report was filed against him. He was not charged criminally but will be hammered with; larceny, shoplifting, a violation of university rules and the rare and mysterious “cafeteria violation”.
Grabbed the snacks, forgot to close the car door
On Sunday at 9:08a.m., officers noticed a motor vehicle in Lot 17 near Forest Hall was parked with the alarm lights flashing and the passenger door open. Officers checked the car for signs of burglary and upon inspection smelled burnt marijuana. The officer found an empty baggie in the cup holder and below the baggie a burnt joint and a brownish-greenish leafy substance. The car turned out to belong to a Bentley student who somehow had tragically forgotten to close their car door upon exiting. He will be charged with possession and use of a controlled substance.
I Heard Bentley was a Fun School
Just after midnight Sunday morning, officers were inspecting Fenway when they encountered a group of approximately 30 individuals in the hall. When the group spotted the officers, they quickly dispersed and fled the building. Two students failed to notice CP and were left in the hall sharing a Bud Light Lime. When student 1 noticed the officers, he quickly passed the beer to student 2 who took a swig then attempted to pass it back once he spotted the officers. When officers approached, Student 1 offered his name and ID and was found to be underage. He was charged with an underage alcohol violation and open consumption of alcohol. Student 2 gave a name to officers that did not match any in the Bentley database. He said that he was from another school and when asked who he was visiting he replied, “no one, I heard that Bentley was a fun school.” After much detective work it was found that student 2 was in fact an underage student at Bentley who was trying to pull the wool over the eyes of our fine police force. He will be nailed with an underage alcohol violation, an open consumption of alcohol, violation of university rules (you must present your ID to a college official if asked at anytime) and disrespect to administrative personnel.
Reefer in Rhodes
Saturday morning at around 2a.m., officers responded to a fire alarm in Rhodes Hall. Upon arrival, they were surprised to find that there was no smoke or other apparent cause of the alarm to be found. When the fire department rolled in they began to investigate the rooms within the apartment. The team discovered a baggie of marijuana and two pipes layered with resin in the bedrooms. When the residents reported back to the room, unaware that their goodies had been found, they immediately apologized for setting off the alarm while cooking, and explained that they had cleared the room of smoke before the fire department had arrived. When the boys in blue informed the residents they had found their stash laying out on their desks, the students admitted to officers that they do indeed enjoy smoking the reefer but had not partaken that evening. They will be charged with a fire alarm cooking violation, possession of drug paraphernalia and possession of a controlled substance. All marijuana was destroyed. Woof.
I can’t stop, it feels so good
Early Sunday morning, an officer making rounds inside Fenway was flabbergasted when he came upon a student urinating in the corner of the second floor stairwell. The officer ordered the student to stop what he was doing immediately. Clearly unable to stop, the male continued peeing until he was good and empty. The satisfied student then started walking away from the officer, ignoring commands to halt. When the officer caught up with him, he noticed an overwhelming odor of alcohol and shortly thereafter determined he had caught an underage drinker. The student was arrested for disorderly conduct and transported to the Waltham Police Department for the night to think about what he had done. He will be judicially charged with an underage alcohol violation and disorderly conduct.
It looks like it got smashed by a huge freakin’ guy
On Sunday at 11:24a.m., officers reported to Falcone East to investigate damage to the walls near the recycling center. They discovered two large, “person-sized” holes in the wall. The two holes were side-by-side and larger than the average person. When the officers questioned students living nearby, they found one student said when he left around 10p.m., there were only two fist-sized holes in the wall. At 2a.m. when he returned, the holes had exponentially grown to crater-size. Due to a lack of suspects the case is considered closed unless further information comes to light.
Hallway Mario Kart?
Saturday at 2:48 a.m. an staff member in Miller Hall reported banana peels spread throughout the middle stairwell in Miller. Facilities were notified and eliminated the potentially dangerous hazard. A Bowser-esque character was reported fleeing the scene earlier in the night.
Don’t drink and play with hammers
Last Saturday morning at 8:46, students in Falcone West called to notify officers that they were having a out of the ordinary morning. When the residents woke up, they were surprised to find that their toilet has been smashed to smithereens and was leaking all over the bathroom floor and into the common room. After wading through inches of water, the students found not only had the toilet been demolished, but the computer speakers had been stolen from the common area. The toilet was dutifully replaced by facilities and the whole situation is still under investigation. We’ll keep you posted on any new details in this curious story.
No Panty Party!
Officers were dispatched to North Campus D at 4 a.m. Saturday morning for a report of an “unwanted male”. The ladies living in the apartment were shocked after waking to find an unknown male passed out on their bedroom floor wearing only “shorts.” Once awoken, he successfully gave his name after a few tries and was strongly slurring his words. This lost sleeping beauty turned out to be a Bentley student living on main campus. Due to his condition, he was taken into protective custody and to the Waltham Police Department for booking. He will be charged with protective custody.
Too much candy
Late Halloween night, just before 2a.m., officers responded to a call of a highly intoxicated male in Rhodes hall. Upon arrival they observed a male leaning over a toilet vomiting up his Halloween goodies. Officers were only able to understand that the male had been drinking but after that they couldn’t understand the answers he gave to their questions. Due to his meager condition, he was transported to the hospital. He will be judicially charged with underage alcohol violation and protective custody.
Judicial all-star
Late Saturday night there was a line of approximately 350 students dressed to impress and waiting to get into the Halloween dance. The line became more of a mob near the entrance to Lacava and a police officer made an announcement to make an orderly line. When the officer put the megaphone back in his patrol car and turned back to the crowd he observed a male walking away from the crowd middle fingers up with both hands and shouting obscene things. Each time he shouted the crowd egged him on. The officer called the student over to his car and the student replied by picking up a traffic cone and hurling it at the officer. The cone fell short of its target and the crowd went wild. The student, who was clearly under the influence of alcohol, was quickly arrested and transported to Waltham Police Department. He will be criminally charged with disorderly conduct and judicially charged with disrespect to administrative personnel, uncooperative with administrative personnel, disorderly conduct, an underage alcohol violation and protective custody.
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